Wouldn't it be nice if the world were flat? That way we could just push off the people we don't like.

So I've finally succumbed to my inner nerd, and now I'm tentatively playing Dota 2 after my sister provided me with a beta key. An advantage of Dota 2 is that the games end. So you don't suddenly lose 8 hours of your day as was sometimes the case with Aion or WoW.

Just now in the shower I was musing about dota, thinking about how the beta doesn't have any other pick modes than all pick (-ap). Then somehow (don't ask me how exactly) I came up with the perfect lyric to go with -sd mode (singledraft). Seriously, it's ridiculous but it fits, here goes:

You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
But if you try sometime
Yeah you just might find
You get what you need!

The Rolling Stones, obviously.

Ok this is so absurdly embarrassing I'm just gonna stop right there.

Dreams

Another awesome night in dreamland for yours truly. I kicked some serious ass fast & furious style. There was an epic car chase, and I was driving like nascar. When I was eventually cornered by the massive amount of police cars + helicopters out to get me, the chase went on on foot. By then I was not alone anymore, there we two other guys trying to help me escape. I was a little shook up from crashing my car into a wall but we ran into a movie theater to escape the police. The back of the theater opened up to some Chinese fighting-camp, which we had to fight our way through. There were some asian chicks with swords which I totally beat the crap out of, I have no idea how I was capable to just hang in the air while my feet kicked them in the head. When we got to the other side of the compound it appeared the police were waiting for us to come out so they could shoot us. This is where (probably because of the bleak prospects) my dream decided to shift. Next I dreamed Marlene lived in the prettiest of fairytale castles, and I was there to visit. It appeared they had a mouse problems in the castle. They were everywhere, but most prominently in Marlene's bedroom. Oh joy. While I was lecturing her on the virtues of mouse-poison, they climbed into my hair and ran over my feet. It was disgusting. She wouldn't listen to my advice either. Next I dreamed that Marlene, me, and some other housemates were in the woods around La Norma and it was summertime. There were bears there, and Marlene thought it was stupid that I didn't want to venture outside the car, said the bears were quite harmless. I couldn't get out of my mind the time in Canada when I had heard a bear had eaten a jogger. I think I did eventually get out of the car, discovering a campsite nearby where all the people were oblivious to the bear-dangers out there.

What a night.

Today I finished a book that I really liked. I don't like this. Finishing books I like makes me sad. It reminds me that all the wonderful things that just took place in my head, the love, the heartbreak, the courage, none of it really happened. I went jogging after and this allowed me to ponder about the book some more as I ran. It made me wonder why it is that I like books so much. Besides the fact that books offer an escape from reality for me, I suppose that another thing I really like is the action. Now, I understand some books don't involve a lot of action, but then usually a lot of thinking is involved. Something happens. I suppose maybe I just enjoy living in illusion for a while, in a place where life is fleeting, life is risky, life is different. It is these kind of books that leave me with a feeling of sadness. I think maybe this is because I envy the fictional reality of the book. That is not to say that my life isn't exciting. But I have to admit it is pretty safe. I (so far) have not been in any situations in which I was forced to be brave or act in a certain drastic way. A situation in which my life was at stake. Now I imagine people from some century of unrest would turn around in their graves, uncomprehending the desire to make a perfectly safe life more dangerous, and I would have to agree, it sounds absurd. Nevertheless I sometimes feel like people who lived in times of war, who lived in fear and who fought for their lives, like these people lived a fuller life than I do. They lived short lives, but intense ones, too. Comparable to a candle that burns bright but short. Mine is steady and long (hopefully, lol). I wish I knew what kind of person I would be in such a time, would I be brave? Strong? Or cowardly and weak? I'll probably never find out.

It seems that the analogy of the books can be extended to movies and music as well, why do we like movies so much? Watch other people lead exciting lives, hear people sing about intense feelings and experiences? Are we bored, perhaps? Is fiction the example set from which we try to imitate out lives to appear equally exciting? I'm pretty happy with my life. Of course, it's as exciting as I choose to make it. But I still wonder what would happen if I was put in a risky situation not by choice but by force of necessity.

Elevator Etiquette

I live on the 8th in a flat that’s 18 stories high, so naturally there’s an elevator present. It’s slow, small, and sometimes it stinks, but it’s an elevator nonetheless. Now I read an article somewhere that people don’t greet each other anymore in elevators. We don’t seem to have that problem. In our elevator it’s custom to say bye when someone leaves, and if you happen to get in while there’s already people inside, you say hi. The rest of the ride you spend actively not looking at each other, this includes avoiding the big mirror on the far side of the elevator because it might look like you’re checking people out in the mirror or worse, checking yourself out. I usually spend the time looking at the numbers changing above the door, and searching for the right key to use when I get out. Anything to drive away the awkward silence when you’re just standing there staring straight ahead, suddenly aware of every tiny detail of your appearance, like the way you’re standing, the way a sniff is suddenly super loud in the otherwise silent elevator, and the way you raise your hand to wipe away a stray hair. It’s all suddenly awkward.

There’s another thing about elevators that bothers me. I don’t know if I’m alone in this observation but let me explain it like this. Have you ever gotten onto an elevator and someone else joined you and he or she presses the 1st floor button. This person is not injured in any way that you can see, he’s not on skates or otherwise stairway-challenged. And when said person gets off on the 1st floor, I can’t help but think to myself he should’ve just taken the stairs. Saving the rest of us some time and giving himself a tiny bit of exercise. It was just one set of stairs after all. However, by thinking about stuff like this I notice I sometimes find myself checking the buttons other people press, and mentally weighing which person has the most ‘right’ of using the elevator. For example when I’m on the elevator with two other people, one who’s going to the 11th floor, and one for the 17th, I can’t help but notice I’m the most likely stairs candidate. I usually comfort myself with the fact that 8 is still pretty high up, and no one would really expect me to take the stairs, but I can’t help but be aware of the fact that I’m the one with the smallest (or I should say lowest) excuse to use the elevator. On the other hand, when I’m on the elevator with someone heading for the 4th and someone for the 6th, I can’t help but feel pretty good about myself. Surely I would take the stairs if I lived on the 4th. Right?

Well I’m beginning to see this ramble for what it is, which is: awkwarrrrd. Ok so it’s just this way of thinking that I have. No big deal.

Ah hell.

test test 1..2..3..

Just checking if I can also post pictures up here.



And wow look at that, it works. This is a bit of Zoutelande sky by the way.

I just had a really weird dream. It's probably due to the fact that I'm staying with my sister, and her house is still new to me. She had to work today so she was up at the break of dawn whereas I, having been fleetingly awake when she left, drifted in and out of sleep for the next couple of hours. There was also a pretty heavy thunderstorm going on outside, that might've helped.

So anyway, I dreamed that I was exactly where I was, namely, in the guest room in my sisters' house. Only in my dream I could hear a noise, and I was instantly aware of my sisters' flatscreen TV and the fact people might want to steal it. So in my dream I walk in to the hall and catch this like 12 year old boy climbing inside through the balcony door. He's pretty small so I'm thinking, I can totally handle this, so i get all up in his face and ask him what the hell he's doing there. He actually admits to wanting to steal stuff, and I escort him to the door to kick him out to the street, but for some reason the front door is suddenly HUGE and there are now two of them with a little foyer in between. Anyway, he doesn't want to go out so I have to drag him out into the street and just as a pass the front doors and realize that this might not have been the brightest idea, I turn around and some old lady is standing in my sisters' house and shuts the door in my face. Cue wake #1.

Ok so I'm relieved it was just a dream, nothing is really going on anyway, the house is prefectly safe. Then sometime later, I think I hear dogfeet clicking on the floor in the living room. I think, Rody? (thats our parents' dog) And I walk downstairs thinking my mom must be here if Rody is here too. Only when I get to the living room there are two Rody's and no mom at all. Somehow I don't even find it weird that there are two Rody's, which is a bit peculiar. But oh well, Cue wake #2.

Ok so I'm half awake, thinking hah! just another silly dream. Then awhile later I hear dog nails on the floor downstairs again. So I head downstairs again and walk into my mom who's halfway up the stairs cleaning.. something. Anyway I'm relieved, see I'm not crazy! she's actually here! And so is Rody, and my aunt. I plop down on the couch happily and start telling them about the weird dreams and yesterday's dinner which was both healthy AND really tasty, so I'm listing the ingredients when.. plop! Cue wake #3.

Now that was just weird honestly, I was even ready to tell them about my weird dream, within the weird dream! There was another variation of the dream in which my sister comes home early and I hear her slam the door and everything. Obviously that didn't happen either.

Anyway it's totally strange when you're dreaming about the actual location you are in and can't separate reality from fiction. Let's not do that again!